Resolving conflict in any relationship can be complicated and overwhelming, but the truth is all couples argue. But, I am here to tell you it’s not a lack of arguing that makes a successful relationship. It is more about how partners argue that plays an important role in long-term relationship success. Learning the right tools to engage in effective communication and exercise healthy conflict resolution skills can serve as a great foundation for any relationship.From my experience, common barriers that block couples from exercising effective conflict resolution can include but are not limited to unwillingness to see your partner’s perspective, unwillingness to compromise, not actively listening, waiting to respond rather than listening to your partner’s point of view, and stonewalling.I believe outlining ground rules for any conversation, easy or difficult, can help to guide couples in working through conflict successfully. Some of these rules include: 1) discussing one issue at a time; 2) taking turns; 3) no name calling; 4) no use of profanity; and 5) being specific and concise. Seems easy enough right? You’d be surprised as to how many couples struggle with rules of interaction and that’s where I come in. It is possible, through practice and commitment, to attain the right skills for you and your partner to have long-term success.If you feel like there is room for growth in your conflict resolution skills, consider the following questions:
- Do you feel like you and your partner are constantly arguing?
- Do you feel like no matter how you try to resolve the issue, you and your partner constantly argue about the same issues?
- Do you get called a nag for bringing up difficult issues?
- Just feeling stuck?
If you are experiencing any of these issues, please contact me for a relationship tune-up!